“Are You Choosing Better or Bitter When Life Bites?”

Mar 11, 2015 | Blog

better or bitter?

Many women struggle with an injustice, a wrong done them by someone they love or by life. They believed being a good person insured them of good in life, yet now they find themselves struggling in an important relationship or their health under seige. “It’s not fair” or “why me?” are thoughts which hound them and their faith in life and people is badly shaken, including their faith in themselves.

I have great empathy for their pain and frustration for I too have felt betrayed by both people and my body. The betrayals felt devastating at the time and I remember feeling so lost as my rules for life had failed me. Who and what was I to trust? Certainly not people, and it felt as though God was on vacation at the very time I needed his help! When your world falls apart, it can be scary and confusing how to make things better….I know.

Life is not fair, at least not the way your mind tells you it ought to be. A crisis in life challenges our belief in life as fair as well as that life plays by the rules we’ve made up for control in life. If we were like machines, performing tasks as our life, our desire for life to be predicable and as we want it to be would be, well, logical. Alas, we are not machines, rather an alchemy of the temporary physical and the eternal spiritual.

Mystery rules life yet navigating life and creating happy and satisfying results does not need to be mysterious. People will disappoint you and life will challenge you, yet your happiness in life comes not from what and who you control, but through your responses with people and in life. Embracing your life as an offers you the opportunity time and time again for the mystery of your life to delight and inspire you.

When you find yourself in a painful place in life, you DO have the power to make things better. How?

1. Reach out for help even if you are afraid. Many a client has confessed to me how scared she was and how hard it was to email me for setting up their free Clarity Session with me. Their fear and lack of confidence in themselves fought with their deeper desire to enjoy more happiness in their life and relationships. Having the courage to change your life for the better does not mean you don’t have fear. Choosing the courage to reach out for help means your fears don’t win and you do.

2. Tend better to your emotions for becoming better, not bitter, in life. Let me give you an example. You’ve noticed your hubby seems unhappy and you are both irritated he’s unhappy and afraid to ask him why he’s so unhappy. What does he have to be unhappy about? No one seems to care if you’re happy or not!

Notice the bitterness creeping in? Your emotions are competing for your attention with caring about your hubby. Learning to tend to your emotions as a way you love yourself as well as others, prevents becoming resentful of those you love. Being a martyr is highly over-rated and bitterness is so yesterday!

3. Understand the difference between the false power of control and the true power of your responses. It is easy to become bitter when life bites you when you believe you are powerless to make things better. Learning you have within you what you need for victory with life’s challenges, makes both your life and the people in it, much more fun!

I trust life and I can teach you to trust yourself in life as well. Life wants you to be healthy and happy, and through engaging your holy, you can be. (Did you know that the words heal, holy, and whole all are from the same root word “whole”?) The grace in your life simply needs your grit to engage for creating a life you are in gratitude for.