Jo’s Story

Jo had a successful career but not so successful history with her strong desire to be in a loving relationships. She was growing weary of her pattern of disappointing men and after one particularly upsetting end to a relationship, Jo contacted me for my help for better success in finding healthy love.

Problem: Through dialogue, guided meditation, and teaching Jo wisdom about woman, men, and relationships, Jo came to understand her patterns in sabotaging her relationships with men.  Jo gained an understanding of her past patterns of relationships with men, allowing her to create new patterns for relationship with men, with my help. Jo started with a 6 month program and her satisfaction with what she had realized in just 6 months led her to sign up for another year.

Outcome:  Jo not only learned to judge herself less critically, she realized how her past had been dictating her present life choices and clouding her future as well. Jo is now able to participate more intimately in her relationships with men as well as being more supportive and more loving with herself and her friends and family as well. Now when problems show up in Jo’s life or love, she can allow her emotions to no longer run her show, and she can stay focused on her goals in life and in love.

 

Patti’s Story

Patti’s life looked happy on the outside yet inside she struggled with a lack  of feeling confident and successful in her roles and in herself. She also found it difficult to truly enjoy herself, feeling guilty if she enjoyed something other than for her family or friends. Her health was suffering as were her relationships, for resentment had built up over many years of putting herself last. And now she had just received a diagnosis of yet again another serious disease. Would she never get a break?

Problem: Through dialogue, Patti and I worked on discovering what made it so difficult for Patti to stand up/speak up for herself and for Patti to understand how she participated in being taken advantage of by her friends and family. Patti needed to learn how to make choices for enjoying her life vs sabotaging not only her relationships but her health as well.

Outcome: Once Patti understood she had a choice about how she showed up in her roles and relationships, she picked up her courage and commitment for caring for herself as much as she did others. She realized her fear of being rejected and unloved if she spoke up/stood up for herself was not true and she learned how to be clear, direct, and neutral in her communications with her family and friends. Much to her surprise, not only did she feel better about herself, those she loved expressed their gratitude for the changes she was making as well.  Her relationships became more authentic and rewarding and even her health improved.

 

Joanne’s Story

Joanne has a successful career she enjoys as an administrator at a private college and juggles her work with raising two children and a husband who travels often in his job. She had developed a series of symptoms which sent her to specialists of all sorts and for which in the end she was told it was all in her head.

Problem:  Joanne wanted help tempering her anxiety about her health so she would not need to take the anti-depressants prescribed which made her head feel fuzzy and as though she was being dismissed as simply imagining how she hurt. After a month of sessions using guided meditation, dialogue, and JaiKaur’s support and guidance for Joanne to trust what she felt and knew within,  Joanne realized she had Lyme disease from a tick bite a couple of years back.

Outcome: Joanne tested positive for advanced Lyme disease and began an aggressive form of treatment. She continued to work with me for strengthening her skills of discerning and deciphering her intuition and inner wisdom, resulting in Joanne realizing not only better health but strengthening her trust in herself and in life being good as well. Joanne is grateful for her renewed health as well as her faith and trust in herself and the power of her inner wisdom. 

Tammy’s Story

Tammy signed up for an on-line course I had offered, excited to learn the material, but noticeably absent in the group’s Q&A and discussions. Other’s in the group noticed her silence and called her on it-it was a women’s empowerment course after all-! That is when Tammy reached out to me for help with a problem she could not solve through simply signing up for a course about what challenged her and then staying silent.

Problem: In the past, Tammy had been excited to create a women’s group until a group member put her down in front of the group.  Tammy’s resultant feelings of shame and rejection created a distrust for Tammy of sharing herself with another group of women, fearing she would again be humiliated and disrespected for all to see. Tammy was unhappy with this realization, for she enjoyed learning with others and wanted to continue doing so.

Outcome: Tammy and I dialogued and discovered what was at the root of the hurt and fear motivating Tammy’s ending her participation in women’s groups.  We replaced beliefs Tammy had formed about what had occurred with updated clarity of her wisdom, strength, and value to others, to community. Not to my surprise, when Tammy shared both her hurt and her learning with the woman who had hurt her, Tammy learned how this women’s own pain and shame had initiated her lashing out at Tammy.  Tammy not only transformed a crippling experience into more understanding and confidence in herself, she also inspired another person to take up healing as well, not uncommon in the work I do with my clients.

  

Todd’s Story

Todd’s habit of neglecting himself for instead taking care of others was beginning to wreak havoc with his health, his marriage, and even his career. Todd came to me for help with his marriage, a marriage Todd complained lacked intimacy and his wife being supportive of him. And Todd was confused-if he was the one sacrificing himself for his family all the time, what reason did his wife have to be so angry with him?

Problem: Todd knew he was unhappy,-his weight and family life told him as much. We discovered through dialogue and guided mediation how Todd’s habit of deflecting care for himself to caring for everyone else was based on staying safe as a child. Once Todd understood this motivation, he shifted his communications to reflecting being an adult. Using me as a mirror and a sounding board proved effective for Todd to sort through old patterns and choose better for his life as an adult and his desires in life.

Outcome: Todd began to honor his needs as important as caring for others, learning to communicate more honestly to his family and friends. Todd realized how truly unhappy he was in his marriage and invited his wife to work on the marriage they were both so unhappy in. And when his wife continued to blame him for her unhappiness, unwilling to listen to the needs of Todd as well, Todd made the choice to leave his marriage, no longer willing to be responsible for his wife’s unhappiness. This choice also motivated Todd to make other choices on his behalf he had been struggling with not making for years. Todd began to wake up happy and excited about his life again!

 

Richard’s Story

Richard was the perfect husband….until his affair with his secretary. A mid-life crisis created by neither Richard nor his wife taking action to mitigate unhappiness in their marriage.  Richard finally did so, believing this to be the only way he would get needs met. He was reluctant to leave his marriage as his two children meant the world to him, but he was tired of being ignored and his needs dismissed by his wife who he supported very well.

Problem: Richard had not tried working on his marriage as he felt he had no power to make a difference. Richard chose to give his marriage another chance and agreed to begin to tell the truth about what he was feeling and wanting in his marriage.  His wife agreed to give their marriage another chance as well and off we went to work on ways for them to communicate and care for each other than neither had even considered would be of help.

Outcome:  Richard is happier in his marriage than he’s been in years and he learned to tell the truth instead of deferring to what he thought others wanted from him and then resenting them. He realized how trying to make others happy by disregarding himself led not to the lack of conflict he believed earlier, but to the deterioration of important relationships. His wife welcomes feeling she can begin to trust him again, the affair teaching her as well to take responsibility for her feelings and fears as well as caring for her husband’s needs as important to know about and to respond to supportively.

 

Peter’s Story

Peter’s beloved dog had died, his grief mixed with anger at his wife of 20 years whose controlling ways he had resigned himself to…or so he thought. The loss of his canine companion gifted him with realizing he was no longer willing to not speak up for what he wanted with his wife, simply for the sake of avoiding conflict with her.

Problem:  Peter had allowed his unease with conflict to turn into his wife running his life, a contract he was realizing was costing him more than it was benefiting him. He resented her control, but she had made it clear she was willing to make his life unpleasant when he disagreed with her.  Yet the death of his beloved dog made Peter realize the accommodations he was used to making was no longer an acceptable choice for him.

Outcome:  Peter learned how every choice has a price and his choice of “peace at any cost”, was costing him his self-respect and happiness. Peter and I identified where he gave up what he wants for avoiding his wife history of threats and tantrums which Peter feared. Realizing fear of his wife was fueling his choices in his life, Peter and I worked together to create skills for Peter to use with his emotions and for addressing conflicts. Over time, much to Peter’s surprise and delight, his confidence in engaging conflict with his wife led to more intimacy and more desire to be with his wife.

 

Tom’s Story

Tom’s business had been very successful…and then it was not. No matter how he tweaked it, nothing he was doing was proving successful. And to add insult to injury, he had found out by a fluke he had cancer and while treatment proved successful, he began to wonder if continuing to work at his business made sense.

Problem:  Tom’s life was begging him to make some changes and he was resistant, wanting his life to be the same as it always had been. But getting cancer had scared him enough to realize he needed to change and how some of his habits were destructive. Tom was willing to explore  techniques to calm his anxiety about making changes in his life and work life for creating more health and a longer life.

Outcome: Tom was inspired by the out-pouring of love and support he had received from people during his scare with cancer.  Tom came to realize his gift for writing and connecting with people were skills he could apply to creating another way of doing business that would present less stress and more time for exercise as well. I taught Tom various meditation techniques he could use during his work day for keeping his stress level under his watch and control.  His family was also happy Tom was easing his anxiety and stress during the day as well, now looking forward to Tom coming home at the end of the day when previously, they had looked for reasons to not be around him.

 

Marilyn’s Story

Marilyn had everything money could buy yet her lack of self-respect and years of self-destructive choices had led to tolerating a husband who loved the bottle more than her. Marilyn struggled to feel good enough about herself to demand her husband get help despite her fear of him leaving her….a fear her parents were happy to reinforce with their greater support of her husband than of her, their own daughter.

Problem:  Marilyn was unhappy, yet blaming her parents for this unhappiness kept Marilyn from taking responsibility for making different choices for creating her happiness.  After an energy healing session with me, Marilyn realized how she was the one making the choice to keep herself captive to her parents’ lack of support for her, all the while wondering why nothing in her life or marriage was changing.    

Outcome:  I worked with Marilyn to identify where and how Marilyn was belittling herself in her life and with her family and parents. I taught Marilyn ways to stand up for herself with her parents and her husband, not mistaking their lack of agreement with her with what was true for her.  Marilyn brought her husband into our process for support in communicating to her husband how his drinking conveyed a lack of love for her and care about their marriage. When her husband did not stop drinking, Marilyn chose to stay married, go to support groups about alcoholism, and to take responsibility for her happiness instead of expecting her husband to make her happy.

 

Penny’s Story

Penny’s childhood of abuse and neglect by her parents had left her with few skills for creating a happy life nor relationships she was happy in. Penny read an article I wrote about relationships and realized her relationship with a man who could never get around to getting divorced was not going to end well. Penny felt stuck, defeated, and was ready to  change.

Problem:  An abusive childhood had left Penny with good survival skills, but not such great skills for creating a happy life or relationships she felt loved and secure in. Her stance of having little faith in others and life was not a good recipe for a satisfying life or love and Penny was tired of the stress and the drama in her pattern of dead-end relationships. Penny was ready to risk learning how to make decisions through trusting herself and others in life vs expecting the worst from others in life.

Outcome: Together, Penny and I worked on discovering her triggers and beliefs which were at the foundation of her unsatisfying experiences of life and love. Penny soon realized how she was sabotaging what she wanted in love and in life as well as making a lot of compromises in her work and love life since she expected so little. Choosing the program of 6 months of my on-going support and presence for her goals, Penny was able to try new choices, have me help her with realizing where she was still using her old survival-based beliefs and patterns, and began enjoying what she was able to create through exercising more confidence and trust in herself, life, and others in her life. Penny was able to realize all the goals she had written down for our 6 months together!

 

Kerri’s Story

Kerri came to me seeking clarity with what seemed endless inner conflicts-needing a larger house, but loving the neighborhood where she was in, wanting to use the studio 30 minutes away she had rented but feeling she ought to be present for every minute of her young boys’ childhoods, etc.  Kerri was conflicted between wanting to be 100% in  her roles of mom and wife ,yet finding no time for her own needs….and feeling guilty and selfish about her needs and desires.

Problem:  Through a dialogue of my questions and Kerri’s answers,  we sorted out the conflicts Kerri was feeling between the “ought to” of her roles and what she wanted or needed for herself. Many of Kerri’s inner conflicts were based in the conflict between beliefs handed to Kerri by her past and parents and beliefs Kerri was being called to take up for trusting herself and what she needed.

Outcome: Kerri updated her beliefs to better reflect both her experiences of life and of her own needs and desires. Kerri began to realize while well-intentioned, her parents rules and regulations for how Kerri was to be safe in life was running some interference with her happiness and her own need to realize what was true for herself. Kerri began to trust herself and her experiences more, leading to a willingness to trust herself for making her choices and decisions.

 

Barbara’s Story

Barb was having a hard time getting clear whether to end her business partnership with the husband she had chosen to divorce. Their divorce had seemed friendly enough until Barb began a friendship with another man.  Now her soon-to-be ex-hubby was not so friendly at the office and making noise about “getting what was his”.  Barb was hurt and confused about what to do as she valued her husband’s contributions to the business, but she was clear their marriage was over.

Problem:  I had Barb make  a list of the assets her husband brought to the business and how she could realize these assets differently if he were to leave the business. Through dialogue and offering Barb some pointed questions to ask of her husband, Barb came to realize while both she and her husband both wanted their friendship to continue, their reasons for doing so were in conflict.

Outcome:  Through dialogue and guided meditation, Barb came to realize how she was sending mixed signals to her husband about their future together and how the arguments she and her husband were spilling over into the business as well. Making a clean break with her husband would allow Barb to take time to be with her emotions about her divorce before jumping into another romance for not being lonely.  Barb left her 6 month program with more clarity about how painful the unwanted divorce was for her husband and how taking time for herself was critical for a better love relationship down the road.

 

Tara’s Story

Tara’s marriage had run smack into midlife crisis and her health also taking a nosedive to the point it seemed she spent more time in doctor’s offices than at home. Tara wanted to learn what she could make better with her marriage, her health, and even her happiness as she was feeling her life was no longer under her control.

Problem: I explained to Tara she had hit the grand slam of what can come with the midlife process-challenges to her health, her marriage, and her happiness all were calling for changes. Tara learned how to meditate in a few different ways and learned how important it was to communicate when she was upset vs not, in the name of being nice. Tara also came to realize through our dialogue process, just how deeply angry and unhappy she was with her husband.

Outcome: Committing to meditation or journaling everyday brought Tara in touch with what she was feeling instead of being too busy to notice and then getting sick or exploding at her family. With practice, Tara learned to speak up when something was bothering her, a choice that did not make her husband happy.  Tara realized her sadness and grief at her marriage being in crisis and initiated marriage counseling, which brought the relief only action-nothing talking or thinking-can bring.

 

Johanna’s Story

Johanna’s professional accomplishments are impressive and her ability to keep up with the needs of her family of 3 teens, no less.  Johanna’s breast cancer shook her world and her marriage and she was feeling a bit challenged in her roles and relationships in life. A move to the East Coast from the West Coast only added to her challenges, for it brought her again in relationship with her family and the history of secrets and lies.

Problem:  Johanna was challenged to care for herself and for taking leadership in her roles and relationships. Her mother’s departure early in Johanna’s life left Johanna with a false conclusion about her worth as well as a skewed perspective about women and men.  Her father response of raising her as a son proved useful for a career in the corporate world, but not so useful in her relationships as a woman.

Outcome:  Johanna and I began by updating her understanding of being a woman, of her roles, and the effects of her mother’s absence and her father’s compensation on how she thought of herself. She came to understand the impact of these matters in her marriage and began to engage different choices in her roles and her relationships. Johanna worked hard to reclaim her leadership as a woman, as a parent, as a partner and began to meet both her and her husband’s emotions as information, not facts carved in stone.  She began to become more comfortable navigating the emotions of conflict as well, no longer equating conflicts in her important relationships with having done something wrong.

 

Catherine’s Story

Catherine had spent several years hostage to an illness with no name, one which left her with little energy other than to lie down on the couch. Formerly a top-notch negotiator for the US government, Catherine was seeking motivation to try to address her health challenges and to update her life’s purpose. Catherine did not suffer fools lightly, my kind way of saying she was less than positive with those seeking to help her.

Problem: Initially, Catherine and I spent time building up trust between us, for Catherine had suffered too many dead ends in her process of trying to feel better. I did not take this personally for hope can be hard to reach for again when it’s been so often dashed.

Outcome:  Catherine was willing to try a series of 4 sessions and would go from there. She was skeptical and resistant at first and after a couple of sessions began to relax enough to be open to what I was saying and try some simple exercises. When she had the first solid night of sleep in weeks, she became intrigued and opened up to engaging more of what I was offering and suggesting. After the fourth session she signed up for a year of working with me and after six months time, was not only able to sleep well but was re-engaging her social life and cooking for her family again.

 

Interested in Learning More About Working With Me?

 Here’s how we begin.

1. Fill out the Clarity Questionnaire (link) and send back to me. This short questionnaire will introduce me to what kind of problem you are looking to solve, what is working and not working for you.

Many clients have told me how even the process of answering the questionnaire made them feel a lot better, less anxious about their problem, because they are able to put into words what has been looping around in their head, making them feel a bit…well, crazy.

2. We set up a time for you and I to talk for 30 minutes-at no cost to you.

This time is yours to ask any questions you may have about how I work, what you may be anxious about in working with me, etc. And if you are ready to begin working together, we schedule a time to begin doing so!

3. How do you know what program to sign up for?

What program, what length of time do you need to realize your desired results?  Many long-term clients began with the package of 4 sessions, realized powerful results, and wanted more.

Other clients began with a 6 or even a 12 month program for they want to commit to a year of working on their backlog of matters they have put off dealing with for too long.  And, they knew themselves well enough to know committing to a length of time with me would keep them honest and accountable to their goals.

If working with me sounds good to you, what you have been searching for, fill out the Clarity Questionnaire and we’ll get started…whoohoo!

I look forward to helping you realize just how delightful your life can become.

Xoxo, JaiKaur